Tuesday, January 01, 2013

HAPPY 2013: I'm STILL Walking the Journey....


I like the quote "HARD - is just a story you've convinced yourself to believe."

I like to hide behind the "story" it's been a "HARD year....", "HARD week..." etc.  With this - it says I've been struggling - please don't ask me to explain or be authentic with you.

I like to hide behind the "story" it's "HARD to lose weight".... or it's "HARD to maintain" .... or it's "HARD to exercise".  These stories say - I've got a great excuse to be obese, be obese or fat (again), or just plain couch potato lazy!

But really the quote is right.  
I've convinced myself that things are HARD (or nearly impossible) when the truth is - the ONLY reason that are hard is because I've declared it so.  I am ripping away the truth and promise "that I CAN DO all things....THRU CHRIST - who strengthens me ".

HARD - is a LIE...and a cop-out.  
And....even though I've run up and against a TON of challenges this past year - thru truth is - I've come thru it! (with my sweet Savior's help....shoulder.... and strong arms pulling me along!)

THIS YEAR WILL NOT BE HARD....
it's gonna be the best one yet!!



Sunday, January 01, 2012

GLORIOUS 2012: Many changes this year....

One of the BIGGEST changes is our state!
Sadly...in July of 2011 the Coates Family boxed up our 850 sq ft. Brooklyn apartment and moved back to BIG TEXAS...this time not Dallas...but back to my home town of San Antonio.  (My husband keeps reminding me it is the 7th largest city in the United States...kind of hard to believe!)

All in all...we've been immensely blessed.  My husband is extremely happy and has a fabulous job.  My daughter is going to an amazing private classical school -- 180* turn from NYC public schools.  And we're all closer to my family.  

I personally miss NYC....I miss every part of the city living....I miss my friends... and I MISS WALKING....
Can't believe I'm even saying that....but I loved the built in exercise....

Monday, January 03, 2011

HAPPY 2011: 4yrs. 9mos. PostOp

 
I'm listening to Misty Edwards - "My Soul Longs for you"
SOOO powerful...I've seen the Lord fall on me like a sudden Rainstorm...it's a pleasant surprise...sometimes uncomfortable...but when it's over -- YOU ARE SOAKING!
I want him like that now...this year.LET IT RAIN in 2011!! 

Hallelujah Jesus...make all things new God!
In a short matter of time - HE ALONE can turn anything around.
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God's riches blessings in your WL Journey....
God has 'FREE'd' me in soooo many ways as I shed 160#'s.....wow.
it's hard to believe this all began nearly 5yrs ago!
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HALLELUJAH!! He makes all things NEW....including ME!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Shedding Light...

"I don't struggle with self esteem".... in the normal sense.

I say 'in the normal sense' - because now, I believe, I have been (and probably still can be) insecure at times. And being insecure led me into some pretty horrid eating patterns and behaviors early in life....which in turn led me thru a couple decades of getting heavier; heavier -eventually leading me to be morbidly obese.

There was a time - not so long ago that I said, "I'm confident, lovable, sexy, liked...loved - and I'm completely happy being 333#'s." -- but then someone asked me "do you diet?"Well...funny enough that question flipped a switch, I barely remember a day from my teenage thru adult years that I WASN'T dieting...OR aware of some sort of food restriction, constraint, restraint...etc. When I answered...he challenged me and said, "I'd invite you to consider that you're not as secure as you are portraying yourself to be."Hmmmm.....interesting. It's amazing when light is shed into a dark place - what you may find. So that day I realized I'm not the stereo typical "insecure"... but I clearly wasn't "secure confident" either.  There was definitely a breakdown in my thinking.
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I set out that day to be authentic with myself...and my family/friends. 

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WOW -- what a journey it's been....over the last 3 and a half years.  I had to confront (and STILL confront) some 'demons in the closet'.  Although, thru some of these tough confrontations I had to also evaluate my choices, look deep into a places of honesty.  Thru this I found tons of self validation as well as validation from those around me - I also found myself not living on a constant "diet."
Funny enough ...I found I had/have "Mother Issues".  I have finally got to a place with my "Mother Issues" where I realize I have been *believing* that I couldn't please her...when actually that is a lie. Praise God, it was just this fall that I had this huge breakthrough - I realized that what I thought were expectations or certain attitudes from my mother....was nothing that my Mother was putting on me or doing -- it was a lie that I had been believing most of my life....wow - when I realized it....it was like I shed another 160#'s....whoa, what freedom!

There is still sooo much more to work out... I get that this is a process.  But, for now...I'm resting in the truth that my mother loves me...accepts me... is proud of me.

AND...I love me...accept me...and am proud of who I am -- not always happy with the choices I choose to make -- but will plug on...with each day I am given -- determined to walk authentically WITH as many LIGHTS ON as possible!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

MERRY CHRISTMAS: 32mos. Post Op


What a wonderful LIFE!

I certainly am thrilled about my weight loss...and maintenance.

Last night I watch one of my most favorite reality shows -- THE BIGGEST LOSER -- I absolutely LOVE that show! I did the math to percentage of weight I have lost in my 161 lbs. I've lost -- 48.2%! I was amazed...wow.


I feel proud...emotional...connected to those people on such a deep level. I don't think their success is MORE SUCCESSFUL...or that my journey is easier...or that I've taken the "easy way out". It's just DIFFERENT.


I like to look at the similarities...we started in the same place...
  • Morbidly Obese

  • In denial about how we were feeling...

  • Depressed

  • Hurting - physically & mentally

  • STUCK!

And then we ended in the same place...


  • Healthy weight

  • Educated about food

  • Educated about exercise

  • Hopefully more sane

  • LESS PAIN

  • Thrilled with a new lease on LIFE!!!
The only difference is....we took a different pathway! I know, for me, that I could've lost weight that way too! I am a strong, capable woman! Not to mention in my late 20's I lost 120's with Weight watchers and Jazzercise! My problem was during that process....I was SOOOO focused on my weight loss...that I didn't properly HEAL my inner self!

Unfortunately, I gained every pound back + about 35 additional pounds! Now....I have a completely different lease on LIFE.


DONT BE MISTAKEN-- I'm NOT completely OVER my my eating issues...I'll need to blog on those thoughts later -- PROMISE I WILL!!


For now, my encouragement to you is.... just enjoy life....be encouraged....and make a choice -- and BELIEVE!!


Believe in yourself...that no matter your pathway you choose YOU CAN DO THIS!!! -----------------------------------------------------



LIFE IS GREAT!!!
























MY LOVE....















Most thankful that My sweet daughter Isabella will have a Mom that can be active with her...live LIFE...and not hold her back - or pass on unhealthy behaviors!

Thursday, December 04, 2008

JOURNAL: "5 Day Pouch Test"

Do you find yourself asking these questions:

  • Does my pouch still work?

  • Have I broken my pouch?

  • Have I ruined my tool?

On the different support boards...and in WLS News & Blogs these tend to be the most common questions many weight loss surgery PostOps find themselves asking during their journey. I would agree with the consensus that it feels like we can eat more food especially when we see that we are eating more food. Sometimes I ask these questions when I see a bit of weight regain.


The following is a 5-day plan that I found on one of the boards and is commonly used to determine the pouch is working and help it return to that tight newbie feeling. The BONUS is it also gets us back to basics of WLS and helps us follow our POUCH RULES - hopefully triggering weight loss. (I'll let you know about this...)


It seems to not be difficult to follow & if high glycemic benge or on a cycle of carbohydrate cravings - this plan promises to break the pattern. Sounds pretty good, right? Here are some things to keep in mind as you try the 5-Day Pouch Test/Plan:



  • The 5 Day Pouch Test should never leave you feeling hungry.

  • You can eat as much of the prescribed menu as you want during the day to satiate hungry and prevent snacking on slider foods and/or white carbs.

  • You must drink a minimum of 64 ounces of water each day.

  • A reduction of caffeinated beverages is suggested, but do not stop caffeine cold turkey.

  • Weight loss is not the intent of the 5 Day Pouch Test, however, many who have tried this plan report a significant drop in weight.

  • More importantly they celebrate a renewed sense of control over their pouch and eating habits and easily transition back to a healthy post-surgical weight loss way of eating.

  • Below you will find a brief list of the menu for each day.

  • Please click the "Read more" links for further detail and hints and tips that will enable your success with the 5 Day Pouch Test.


Days One & Two: Liquid Protein low-carb protein shakes, broth, clear or cream soups, sugar-free gelatin and pudding..


Day 3: Soft Protein canned fish (tuna or salmon) eggs, fresh soft fish (tilapia, sole, orange roughy.


Day 4: Firm Protein ground meat (turkey, beef, chicken, lamb), shellfish, scallops, lobster, fresh salmon or halibut.


Day 5: Solid Protein white meat poultry, beef steak, pork, lamb, wild game.


I'm beginning this tomorrow...so let me know if you try this...I'll give you my results when I'm finished! Good luck!


Friday, October 24, 2008

Health Assessment: Get Healthy for LIFE!!


Section 1 - Medical and Family History

My Physical Parameters-

  • Height: 68 inches

  • Weight: 177 pounds

  • Body Mass Index (BMI) - My BMI: 26.9


The BMI has become the standard in medicine for determining whether or not you have a weight problem. This has now replaced the traditional height/weight charts. The following is a breakdown of the various ranges of BMI: (This is the same for both men and women)

  • Less than 18.9 -Underweight

  • 19 to 24.9 - Normal Ranges

  • 25 to 29.9 - Overweight (Pre-Obese)

  • 30 to 34.9 - Obesity Class I (Obese)

  • 35 to 39.9 - Obesity Class II (Moderately Obese)

  • Over 40 - Obesity Class III (Severely Obese)
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Another Standard of Measurement has become the waist circumference....which best determines what is now referred to as abdominal fat (Central Fat).

My waist measurement is given as: "Females: greater than 34 inches" - I have a 34'' waist measurement.

Fat that collects in the abdomen is more metabolically active and has serious health consequences. This is why the mainstream media and the health care community are now referring to this central fat as “killer fat”. You can easily determine the amount of abdominal fat by simply measuring your waist (approximately one inch below your umbilicus—belly button).

When this waist measurement gets over 28 inches for women and over 34 inches for men, there is concern that you have already “tipped over” into this abnormal metabolic state known as insulin resistance. When this becomes greater than 34.5 inches in females or greater than 40 inches in males, you most likely have already developed the full-blown Metabolic Syndrome due to insulin resistance.

____________________________________

Many programs strongly recommend that you do not weigh yourself. When the scale becomes a motivator, it will soon become the reason you quit most programs....

For me, I've had to start thinking differently about my Health and Wellness...not as a "DIET" or a weight loss program but instead - the development of healthy lifestyles - it is simply developing healthy lifestyles that have a side effect of permanent weight loss. It is so much better to simply enjoy your clothes becoming looser or your waist measurement decreasing.
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Section 2 - Lifestyle HistoryStress is a great enemy to your overall health and desire to achieve your ideal body weight. Your body can handle a mild to moderate amount of stress without any major health consequences; however, a high amount or prolonged amount of stress is dangerous to your health. It stimulates the release of an excessive amount of stress hormones that not only increase your appetite but also increase the amount of free radical production and inflammation in your body.


Over time this can lead to a depleted immune system, antioxidant system, and eventually to a serious chronic degenerative disease. Developing healthy lifestyles can significantly decrease the amount of stress your body must endure while at the same time protecting against the damaging effects of stress.


The only thing that the body cannot handle is inactivity.


Along with our poor eating habits, lack of exercise is one of the main reasons we are facing the obesity and diabetes epidemic today. When the body is not physically active, we become much less sensitive to our insulin. However, different medical research studies have shown that simply walking briskly or the equivalent physical activity for 30 minutes five times a week will significantly increase the sensitivity to our insulin. This is why exercise is such a critical aspect of developing a healthy life! It doesn’t matter whether you are involved in hiking, swimming, racquetball, tennis, basketball, or biking - what matters is the fact that you are involved in a consistent, modest exercise program that gets the body moving.


Now working out one or two days a week is really not an exercise program. Ideally you want to be involved in an aerobic activity 4 to 5 times per week for around 30 minutes. Having a weight resistance program along with your aerobic activity is even better.


_______________________________________


Less than 10% of the adult population gets the recommended 8 to 12 servings of fruits and vegetables every day. This is one of the most important recommendations when it comes to your health. Fruits and vegetables contain the vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants that our bodies so desperately need. This is the reason that individuals who eat 8 to 12 servings of fruits and vegetables each day decrease their risk of heart disease, stroke, cancer, diabetes, and Alzheimer’s dementia by 2 to 3 fold. This is why if you are a WLS (weight-loss surgery) patient it is imperative that you maintain your nutritional supplements, not to mention that you are taking a nutritional supplement that you can trust.


White bread, wheat flour bread, white flour, rice, pasta, cereals, and potatoes spike your blood sugar faster than if you were slapping table sugar onto your tongue. The health consequences of consuming these foods are not only just as bad as sugar—they can be much, much worse. They lead to what is called glycemic stress, carbohydrate addiction, and can eventually lead to diabetes and heart disease.


Not all carbohydrates are bad. Only these highly processed carbohydrates and potatoes. Eating whole grain breads, cereals, and certain rice and potatoes is critical in protecting your health.
____________________________________________

If you truly start thinking differently about Health and Wellness- living a healthy lifestyle & not as a "DIET" or a weight loss program but instead - you will begin to develop a healthy lifestyles pattern. After reading Dr Ray D. Strand's "Healthy for Life" website...and he states, "[Healthy for Life] is a 15 month program. I have learned over the past 10 years of helping my patients with this program that it takes this long for these new, healthier lifestyles to simply become a way of life." I can attest to this...I'm now 16 months post op...and now after these many months...I see that I've been learning to look at things differently...and am beginning new healthy lifestyle changes.
I've found that a great jump start to getting back on track and helping my body off of a weight-loss stall is thru ISAGENIX....

http://deborahcoates.isagenix.com
- See more at: http://deborahcoates.isagenix.com/us/en/home.dhtml#sthash.zqNMTuIP.dpuf





Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Miss PIGGY -- no More....

Looking thru my photos I found this picture of me this summer.... and it hit me -- I had my photo taken with a "PIG" mural...
HUH?? REALLY??

There was a time this would NOT have escaped me.
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Thursday, August 07, 2008

"IT'S ALL IN THE WAY THAT YOU LOOK...at yourself"


Growing up....



  • - "little piggie"...


  • - "sneaky eater"...


  • - "could be so pretty if... I lost some weight"...


  • - 11/13 sizes bigger than my size "0" best friend...


  • - someone whose mother had to keep snack foods from her.

Many of these words sent me into a lot of spiral of negative thoughts about my body...which in turn further perpetuated my eating disorder. I was what some would call a stereotypical eating disorder sufferer (an adolescent, white female who comes from a middle- to upper-class family.)

The truth is....eating disorders know no gender, ethnic, age or class lines, but there is some truth to the stereotype:

When I saw this mural on a little side street while walking in Brooklyn...I slung my camera at my Mom, and ran across the street yelling back, asking her to snap my picture. The moment I saw this -- I loved it!
It spoke to me....I loved it's artistic nuances....but also loved it for what it meant to me in this new place of my journey.

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Sunday, November 11, 2007

JOURNAL: Put Away Childish Things



"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things." ~1 Corinthians 13: 11

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WHAT exactly does this mean.... ??

WHAT was Paul talking about.... ??

He couldn't be talking about toys, dolls, games - I'm sure he's talking about anger...cruelty...judgement...jealousy...spite - all the childish emotions that we lose ourselves to...that we REACT to - those emotions that hurt ourselves and hurt others. All of which gains nothing - and loses a lot.

But it seems many 'People of Today' like the drama...thrive off of it...they thrive off of being rude....'shooting from the hip' w/o thinking of others feelings. Maybe it's those sad country songs...all the 'reality TV....fighting and bity-ness....and even just the plain ol' 5 o'clock news! Do we turn away from it all - give it up - shrug it off ??

According to Dr. Christine Northrup (author of: The Wisdom of Menopause)
Three things that make you feel better than drugs or alcohol or sugar:
  • exercise
  • meditation
  • sex

But suppose one really likes those sad country songs, or enjoys rooting against a disliked football team, watches a negative TV show, and so on? Must we give it up? To my mind, to judge these things and so attempt to purge them from our interests is to miss the point entirely. Judging ourselves or others for something we now call childish, is simply substituting one childish emotion for another. In addition, these interests of ours are a big part of what we are, and that is not something we are trying to avoid; in fact, it is just the kind of thing we are trying to see, to penetrate.
Much better to begin to apply our understanding of system ideas to our life, our interests. The point is, there are reasons for putting away childish things, and when we understand these reasons, both theoretically and personally, practically nothing will be able to stop us from putting away those things that are delaying our evolution, interfering with our deepest intents.
Only apparent change comes from without—whether that "without" is society, or our false personality. Real change comes from within.


"Brethren, be not children in understanding: howbeit in malice be ye children, but in understanding be men." ~1 Corinthians 14: 20

Monday, October 22, 2007

Wow...what a journey....I'm continually amazed at where I've come from. It's very difficult to continue to loose weight...and I still have 24#'s to goal. I'm constantly battling thoughts of regaining... frustration... obsession... wild thoughts.... fear... all surrounding my weight. All surrounding my thoughts & authenticity about food. The facts are...I know the skinny on the skinny...and it's not a formula...or a game...it's a continuous work on my inner self...being authentic about what's really going on and surrendering to my King...having faith that only HE can calm this storm that rages inside of me....I must go back to Peace.

"The winds and the waves shall obey thy will - Peace be still.... Peace be still. Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea or demons, or men, or whatever it be. No water can swallow the ship where lies The Master of ocean and earth and sky They all shall sweetly obey thy will.... Peace, peace, be still."


I'm thankful to know where I came from...and to thank God that he's calmed my storm...and continues to calm my storms.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

JOURNAL: October 20th/ 2007 - 18 mos PostOp




Wow...what a journey....I'm continually amazed at where I've come from. It's very difficult to continue to loose weight...and I still have 24#'s to goal. I'm constantly battling thoughts of regaining... frustration... obsession... wild thoughts.... fear... all surrounding my weight. All surrounding my thoughts & authenticity about food. The facts are...I know the skinny on the skinny...and it's not a formula...or a game...it's a continuous work on my inner self... being authentic about what's really going on and surrendering to my King...having faith that only HE can calm this storm that rages inside of me....I must go back to Peace.

___________________________

"The winds and the waves shall obey thy will - Peace be still.... Peace be still. Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea or demons, or men, or whatever it be. No water can swallow the ship where lies The Master of ocean and earth and sky They all shall sweetly obey thy will.... Peace, peace, be still."
_________________________

I'm thankful to know where I came from...and to thank God that he's calmed my storm...and continues to calm my storms.



Tuesday, October 16, 2007

JOURNAL: "Pre-Bariatric Surgery weight loss..."

  • "Obese patients who lose up to 10 percent of body weight before bariatric surgery have more rapid postoperative weight loss?? "1

I didn't lose ANY weight before my surgery....and although, I think that it's a good idea - I think this is a rediculous quote...and I am living proof that's it most likely not true. By my one year surgi-versary I had lost over 77% of my excess weight...now, 18mos post op....I've lost 86% of my excess weight!

According to an online article....it's seems to think differently:

  • "Those who lost more than 10 percent of their excess weight before surgery were more than twice as likely to have lost 70 percent of excess weight one year afterward, compared with those who lost between none and 5 percent of their excess pounds before surgery."2

BLAH BLAH BLAH!!! I really hate this sesational crap-o-la...

________________________

ANYWAY...it's not about a "formula" - it's about working hard...learning about nutrition...practicing a good exercise behavior...making good choices...having self-control...and being authentic with your inner self and WHY you got to became morbidly obese in the first place!

1 & 2 - United Press International; "Pre-bariatric surgery weight loss helpful"- Published: 16, 2007 at 5:17 PM

Saturday, October 06, 2007

JOURNAL: "Losing 158 pounds has been a JOURNEY..."

....and a DREAM!! Losing a 158 pounds has not only been a journey...but an adventure.
It has been a time to be authentic...a time to be honest...not only with myself, but with those around me.
It has been a pilgrimage of walking thru many years in and out of obesity...trusting God not only for the trek - but the pathway - and getting real about "Health & Wellness."

To me, Health & Wellness is three sided triangle...balanced perfectly on each side...there can be no unity in the equation unless you look at them & deal with them each equally.

  • - weight & exercise
  • - food & nutrition
  • - my "thoughts & feelings"...


truly began - "Good" resulted in facing the pain. His word stood firm - For years, I hid inside myself with my weight issues - or my denial of my ‘weight issues’....once the weight started melting off, God showed me the deeper fights I had to face. "SAY WHAT?!"
It is not about "DIET" or "FAT FREE" - & I needed to understand more about food & nutrition... and make sure I understood 'what' and 'why' certain foods were better choices than others. Thru this journey I found that a regimen of whole foods, nutritional supplements, fasting and ‘functional’ exercise could be the choice for my new life.

Although I’d love to say that "did the trick"....it didn’t....it only opened my hearts door wider. And honestly...this is where my journey toward wholeness & freedom began. Only when I began to face the truth and stop avoiding the pain was I able to identify the smallest childhood pain - that to some might seem insignificant - but to a little 6 yr. old mind - was HUGE.

By facing this truth about myself...and letting God take me there, I found that I trusted Him more and more with my feelings.

This is where my healing began....and HIS truth....My Lords Word came alive -

  • "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." ~Romans 8:28


And now, awakened from my slumber of disillusions & dishonesty I found...self-control & self-discipline....education & awareness...and the pursuit of truth thru trusting God... ALL producing - "Miracle upon Miracles...& Grace upon Grace!"
No matter what you’re dealing with....if you have the courage to stand with authenticity in the pain you are facing - you will move beyond it to freedom and the fulfilment of your dreams.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Finding your Style when you lose Weight!

 
This IS a Weight Loss dilemma not only a WLSurgery dilemma! Get to know your new body...and what looks good on you - NOT JUST what fits! 

~Deborah

FINDING YOUr style.....

It's soooo important!

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Be Brave...walk each day as it comes...minute by minute!

___________________________________
"Stand in the space that has been created for you, by being braver today than you were yesterday." ~Star Jones Reynolds
____________________________________________

I love this quote....

Monday, July 16, 2007

JOURNAL: Usana....

On your MARK....RESET....Go!!!
I've done the weight loss success formula called the RESET Pack (basically a a 5 day "fiber clease" ) with USANA.
It was sooo great - basically it was replacing my meals and snacks for five days with the conveniently packaged USANA Macro-Optimizers and begin "fresh" with a new, healthier lifestyle.
______________________________
In five days, here is what happened:
  • Lost the Cravings—it helped reduce carbohydrate cravings with the low-glycemic bars...and they were soooo delish!
  • Lost the Pounds — I dropped nearly 7 pounds!!! (6.8#'s...and I've been on a stand-still....and now...continue to lose!)
  • Jump-start to getting back on track with my healthy lifestyle — in hopes that I can lose that last 30#'s.....
  • FOUND the initiative to the "New Me"— Helped me discover a smart simple plan....that leads me to a lean, healthy, and energetic person inside of me! Just what I needed!!!
The whole RESET came with a simple guide, DVD, and magnet, and vitamins for the full 5 days (prepacked for AM/PM)....15 pre-packaged protein shakes, 10 nutrition bars. (one snack/protien, one fiber for each day!) I got the variety pack so my shakes were chocolate, strawberry and vanilla....and then I had the 'peanut crunch bars' and 'lemon bars.'
____________________________
Then now to maintain....it's been really simple. I've just doing my vitamins...the snack bars, protein shakes (to replace my morning meal... and sometimes an afternoon/lunch). This is not like any other "shake diet" I have ever tried. This program has kept me full, energized, and will help you accomplish your weight loss goals too!
If you are interested in trying it....check it out at my Journey Back 2 Health website!