My Weight History....over the last 19mos.

JOURNAL: Put Away Childish Things

"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things." ~1 Corinthians 13: 11

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WHAT exactly does this mean.... ??

WHAT was Paul talking about.... ??

He couldn't be talking about toys, dolls, games - I'm sure he's talking about anger...cruelty...judgement...jealousy...spite - all the childish emotions that we lose ourselves to...that we REACT to - those emotions that hurt ourselves and hurt others. All of which gains nothing - and loses a lot.

But it seems many 'People of Today' like the drama...thrive off of it...they thrive off of being rude....'shooting from the hip' w/o thinking of others feelings. Maybe it's those sad country songs...all the 'reality TV....fighting and bity-ness....and even just the plain ol' 5 o'clock news! Do we turn away from it all - give it up - shrug it off ??

According to Dr. Christine Northrup (author of: The Wisdom of Menopause)
Three things that make you feel better than drugs or alcohol or sugar:

• exercise
• meditation
• sex

But suppose one really likes those sad country songs, or enjoys rooting against a disliked football team, watches a negative TV show, and so on? Must we give it up? To my mind, to judge these things and so attempt to purge them from our interests is to miss the point entirely. Judging ourselves or others for something we now call childish, is simply substituting one childish emotion for another. In addition, these interests of ours are a big part of what we are, and that is not something we are trying to avoid; in fact, it is just the kind of thing we are trying to see, to penetrate.
Much better to begin to apply our understanding of system ideas to our life, our interests. The point is, there are reasons for putting away childish things, and when we understand these reasons, both theoretically and personally, practically nothing will be able to stop us from putting away those things that are delaying our evolution, interfering with our deepest intents.
Only apparent change comes from without—whether that "without" is society, or our false personality. Real change comes from within.


"Brethren, be not children in understanding: howbeit in malice be ye children, but in understanding be men." ~1 Corinthians 14: 20

Wow...what a journey....I'm continually amazed at where I've come from. It's very difficult to continue to loose weight...and I still have 24#'s to goal. I'm constantly battling thoughts of regaining... frustration... obsession... wild thoughts.... fear... all surrounding my weight. All surrounding my thoughts & authenticity about food. The facts are...I know the skinny on the skinny...and it's not a formula...or a game...it's a continuous work on my inner self...being authentic about what's really going on and surrendering to my King...having faith that only HE can calm this storm that rages inside of me....I must go back to Peace.

"The winds and the waves shall obey thy will - Peace be still.... Peace be still. Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea or demons, or men, or whatever it be. No water can swallow the ship where lies The Master of ocean and earth and sky They all shall sweetly obey thy will.... Peace, peace, be still."

I'm thankful to know where I came from...and to thank God that he's calmed my storm...and continues to calm my storms.

JOURNAL: October 20th/ 2007 - 18 mos PostOp

Wow...what a journey....I'm continually amazed at where I've come from. It's very difficult to continue to loose weight...and I still have 24#'s to goal. I'm constantly battling thoughts of regaining... frustration... obsession... wild thoughts.... fear... all surrounding my weight. All surrounding my thoughts & authenticity about food. The facts are...I know the skinny on the skinny...and it's not a formula...or a game...it's a continuous work on my inner self... being authentic about what's really going on and surrendering to my King...having faith that only HE can calm this storm that rages inside of me....I must go back to Peace.

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"The winds and the waves shall obey thy will - Peace be still.... Peace be still. Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea or demons, or men, or whatever it be. No water can swallow the ship where lies The Master of ocean and earth and sky They all shall sweetly obey thy will.... Peace, peace, be still."

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I'm thankful to know where I came from...and to thank God that he's calmed my storm...and continues to calm my storms.

JOURNAL: "Pre-Bariatric Surgery weight loss..."

• "Obese patients who lose up to 10 percent of body weight before bariatric surgery have more rapid postoperative weight loss?? "1

I didn't lose ANY weight before my surgery....and although, I think that it's a good idea - I think this is a rediculous quote...and I am living proof that's it most likely not true. By my one year surgi-versary I had lost over 77% of my excess weight...now, 18mos post op....I've lost 86% of my excess weight!

According to an online article....it's seems to think differently:

• "Those who lost more than 10 percent of their excess weight before surgery were more than twice as likely to have lost 70 percent of excess weight one year afterward, compared with those who lost between none and 5 percent of their excess pounds before surgery."2

BLAH BLAH BLAH!!! I really hate this sesational crap-o-la...

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ANYWAY...it's not about a "formula" - it's about working hard...learning about nutrition...practicing a good exercise behavior...making good choices...having self-control...and being authentic with your inner self and WHY you got to became morbidly obese in the first place!

1 & 2 - United Press International; "Pre-bariatric surgery weight loss helpful"- Published: 16, 2007 at 5:17 PM

JOURNAL: "Losing 158 pounds has been a JOURNEY..."

....and a DREAM!! Losing a 158 pounds has not only been a journey...but an adventure.
It has been a time to be authentic...a time to be honest...not only with myself, but with those around me.
It has been a pilgrimage of walking thru many years in and out of obesity...trusting God not only for the trek - but the pathway - and getting real about "Health & Wellness."

To me, Health & Wellness is three sided triangle...balanced perfectly on each side...there can be no unity in the equation unless you look at them & deal with them each equally.

• - weight & exercise
• - food & nutrition
• - my "thoughts & feelings"...

truly began - "Good" resulted in facing the pain. His word stood firm - For years, I hid inside myself with my weight issues - or my denial of my ‘weight issues’....once the weight started melting off, God showed me the deeper fights I had to face. "SAY WHAT?!"
It is not about "DIET" or "FAT FREE" - & I needed to understand more about food & nutrition... and make sure I understood 'what' and 'why' certain foods were better choices than others. Thru this journey I found that a regimen of whole foods, nutritional supplements, fasting and ‘functional’ exercise could be the choice for my new life.

Although I’d love to say that "did the trick"....it didn’t....it only opened my hearts door wider. And honestly...this is where my journey toward wholeness & freedom began. Only when I began to face the truth and stop avoiding the pain was I able to identify the smallest childhood pain - that to some might seem insignificant - but to a little 6 yr. old mind - was HUGE.

By facing this truth about myself...and letting God take me there, I found that I trusted Him more and more with my feelings.

This is where my healing began....and HIS truth....My Lords Word came alive -

• "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." ~Romans 8:28

And now, awakened from my slumber of disillusions & dishonesty I found...self-control & self-discipline....education & awareness...and the pursuit of truth thru trusting God... ALL producing - "Miracle upon Miracles...& Grace upon Grace!"
No matter what you’re dealing with....if you have the courage to stand with authenticity in the pain you are facing - you will move beyond it to freedom and the fulfilment of your dreams.

Finding your Style when you lose Weight!

 
This IS a Weight Loss dilemma not only a WLSurgery dilemma! Get to know your new body...and what looks good on you - NOT JUST what fits! 

~Deborah

FINDING YOUr style.....

It's soooo important!

Be Brave...walk each day as it comes...minute by minute!

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"Stand in the space that has been created for you, by being braver today than you were yesterday." ~Star Jones Reynolds

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I love this quote....

JOURNAL: July 23rd - "15 mos. Post Op"

JOURNAL: Usana....

On your MARK....RESET....Go!!!

I've done the weight loss success formula called the RESET Pack (basically a a 5 day "fiber clease" ) with USANA.

It was sooo great - basically it was replacing my meals and snacks for five days with the conveniently packaged USANA Macro-Optimizers and begin "fresh" with a new, healthier lifestyle.

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In five days, here is what happened:

• Lost the Cravings—it helped reduce carbohydrate cravings with the low-glycemic bars...and they were soooo delish!
• Lost the Pounds — I dropped nearly 7 pounds!!! (6.8#'s...and I've been on a stand-still....and now...continue to lose!)
• Jump-start to getting back on track with my healthy lifestyle — in hopes that I can lose that last 30#'s.....
• FOUND the initiative to the "New Me"— Helped me discover a smart simple plan....that leads me to a lean, healthy, and energetic person inside of me! Just what I needed!!!

The whole RESET came with a simple guide, DVD, and magnet, and vitamins for the full 5 days (prepacked for AM/PM)....15 pre-packaged protein shakes, 10 nutrition bars. (one snack/protien, one fiber for each day!) I got the variety pack so my shakes were chocolate, strawberry and vanilla....and then I had the 'peanut crunch bars' and 'lemon bars.'

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Then now to maintain....it's been really simple. I've just doing my vitamins...the snack bars, protein shakes (to replace my morning meal... and sometimes an afternoon/lunch). This is not like any other "shake diet" I have ever tried. This program has kept me full, energized, and will help you accomplish your weight loss goals too!

If you are interested in trying it....check it out at my Journey Back 2 Health website!

JOURNEY BACK 2 HEALTH & A Journey Back to Me....

Two years ago I weighed 333 pounds...and finally found myself at the breaking point. There were many factors that led up to my "breaking point" ... but one was when I was going for my annual physical and my doctor confronted me about my weight. He said if something didn’t change about my weight that my future would be grim...and he’d give me five years to start getting some major co-morbidities. This was shocking.

Being nearly 200 lbs overweight & classified "Super Morbidly Obese" - as well as being the mother of a 2 year old (at the time) - got me to looking at not only what my weight was doing to ME...but to my husband and daughter as well.
Because of the severity of my obesity, my health needs, & my past diet failures - I decided that weight loss surgery was the best choice for my life - and my future. In making this decision I felt "free" - but also a deeper sense of responsiblity than I ever have before.
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The next months were filled with preparations for my surgery...but I also spent a significant amount of time looking deeper into health and wellness. I figure if I was going to be putting a smaller amounts of food in my body - I would need to understand more about food than ‘fat free" or "diet"...and make sure I understood what and why certain food were better choices than others. Thru this research I found that a regimen of whole foods, nutritional supplements, fasting and functional exercise would be the best choice for my new lifestyle.


I was introduced to USANA by my sister Kathy... and I’m sooo thankful. Not only for my cellular health...but also the business opportunity. My husband and I live in NYC...and he is a student, while I am freelance designer...when I heard about the simple structure & the tax advantages - we knew that we had to get into the business. USANA is a company that cares about people, and the structure of our business has brought our entire family together - working our businesses together- what FUN!
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I still have about 40 pounds left to lose until I reach my goal. And because I am 16mos. post op from my surgery... the weight loss is 80% my behavior & 20% the surgery. I have to eat right and exercise to get these last 40 lbs off.

The weight loss success formula I am using- starts with RESET Pack (inside there are instructions that will explain the whole plan).... and then maintains with an order of one bottle of Essential Vitamins (a must!), two boxes of bars and six cans of Nutrimeals. This is about a months supply and everything has a thirty day money back guarantee.... so, try it risk free! This is not like any other "shake diet" I have ever tried. This program has kept me full, energized, and will help you accomplish your weight loss goals too!


I’m excited to share with you USANA Health Sciences they formulate an exceptional, science-based nutritional and personal-care products. However, inferior manufacturing can destroy even the greatest product formulations. For this reason, USANA manufactures its own nutritional supplements, and voluntarily meets Pharmaceutical Good Manufacturing Practices (GMP). Pharmaceutical GMP standards are far more stringent than the food GMP requirements set by the U.S. government for supplements. Because of this high quality standard- I have found USANA the best choice in nutritional supplements. Especially, for me, being a weight-loss surgery patient who needs the highest quality of nutritional supplements in my everyday maintainence plan.

JOURNAL: June 23rd - "14 mos. PostOp"

The Same "Little Black Dress....."

Well....this little number certainly didn't go to waist - and it was a great accomplishment to wear the same "Little Black Dress" that I wore 10 yrs. ago at our Ten Year Class Reunion.

I was glad to be VERY near my goal...but also to be within a pound and a half of where I was 10yrs. ago!!

Miracle upon Miracle!! What a blessing!

I'm thankful.....and we had a wonderful evening...actually the entire weekend was nice. You can read more on our "COATES FAMILY: Summer Adventures!"

Weight Loss: How Many Pounds? How Many Calories?

I found a blog about what it would take to lose a pound of fat. It seems that is a popular way to gauge the enormity of what all of us are doing here.

This site calculates more information than you'd probably wanted to know about just what you have accomplished.

1 pounds is the average weight of 0.53 quarts of water.

To lose that amount of fat would mean to burn 3,500 calories! That is the equivalent of 0.13 gallons of gasoline.

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Below is 1 pound converted to other forms of fuel.

3,500 calories is equivalent to:

• 0.13 gallons of gasoline, or
• 1.33 pounds of coal, or
• 1.73 pounds of oven-dried wood, or
• 0.23 gallons of propane

This amount of energy would ...

• Brew about 10 pots of coffee, or
• Light a 60-watt light bulb for 68 hours ( 3 days = 0.03 years)

Cutting 3,500 calories is the same as saying "no" to:

• 44 apples, or
• 35 bananas, or
• 206 cups of cabbage (whew!), or
• 24 baked potatoes, or
• 44 large eggs, or
• 29 cups of 2% milk, or
• 3 pounds of ground beef, or
• 40 glasses of wine, or
• 11 Snickers bars, or
• 15 Clif Bars ( 19 Luna Bars), or
• 25 cans of Coke, or
• 21 pints of Guinness beer, or
• 7 Big Macs, or
• 7 Quarter Pounders with Cheese, or
• 5 Whoppers, or
• 11 Subway 6" Oven Roasted Chicken Breast sandwiches, or
• 21 Taco Bell crunchy tacos, or
• 15 slices of pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut
• What it Takes to Burn 3,500 Calories

To burn 3,500 calories, a 190 pound male would have to:

• Backpack for 6 hours (0 days) nonstop, or
• Walk for 13 hours (1 days) at 3 mph straight, or
• Walk 40 miles (25 kilometers), or
• Bike for 10 hours (0 days) at 10 mph, or
• Bike 101 miles (63 kilometers), or
• Play basketball nonstop for 6 hours 0 days), or
• Play billiards for 16 hours (1 days), or
• Go bowling for 14 hours (1 days), or
• Stay on the golf course for 10 hours (0 days), or
• Spend 5 hours (0 days) playing competitive football, or
• Jump rope for 4 hours (0 days) straight!

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To date I've lost 150 pounds -

the average weight of a 20-year old male.

How Much Fuel Is That?
To lose that amount of fat would mean to burn 525,000 calories! That is the equivalent of 16.94 gallons of gasoline. Humans, however, are far more efficient than cars, getting about 912 "miles to the gallon". If you could dump this many calories into the tank of a Honda Civic, you would be able to drive it about 576 miles before running out of gas!

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150 lbs. converts to other forms of fuel or 525,000 calories is equivalent to:

• 16.94 gallons of gasoline, or
• 187.55 pounds of coal, or
• 260.45 pounds of oven-dried wood, or
• 22.94 gallons of propane

This amount of energy would ...

• Brew about 1,464 pots of coffee, or
• Light a 60-watt light bulb for 10,169 hours ( 424 days = 1.23 years)

Cutting 525,000 calories is the same as saying "no" to:

• 6,563 apples, or
• 5,250 bananas, or
• 30,882 cups of cabbage (whew!), or
• 3,621 baked potatoes, or
• 6,563 large eggs, or
• 4,375 cups of 2% milk, or
• 378 pounds of ground beef, or
• 6,034 glasses of wine, or
• 1,625 Snickers bars, or
• 2,188 Clif Bars ( 2,917 Luna Bars), or
• 3,777 cans of Coke, or
• 3,088 pints of Guinness beer, or
• 1,067 Big Macs, or
• 1,019 Quarter Pounders with Cheese, or
• 750 Whoppers, or
• 1,591 Subway 6" Oven Roasted Chicken Breast sandwiches, or
• 3,088 Taco Bell crunchy tacos, or
• 2,234 slices of pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut

What it Takes to Burn 525,000 Calories

To burn 525,000 calories, a 190 pound male would have to:

• Backpack for 869 hours (36 days) nonstop, or
• Walk for 2,011 hours (84 days) at 3 mph straight, or
• Walk 6,034 miles (3,772 kilometers), or
• Bike for 1,522 hours (63 days) at 10 mph, or
• Bike 15,217 miles (9,511 kilometers), or
• Play basketball nonstop for 837 hours 35 days), or
• Play billiards for 2,431 hours (101 days), or
• Go bowling for 2,027 hours (84 days), or
• Stay on the golf course for 1,522 hours (63 days), or
• Spend 677 hours (28 days) playing competitive football, or
• Jump rope for 639 hours (27 days) straight!

You would have to walk the length of England about 10.14 times to burn 525,000 calories.

How Long it Will Take?

The range for safe weight loss is about 1 to 3 pounds of fat per week. It could take anywhere between 50 to 150 weeks (12 to 35 months) to safely and reasonably lose that amount of weight.

A great place to start your journey would be with our series called "10 Fat Mistakes" It shares the ten most common mistakes people make and how to overcome them.

Tis the Season...

BATHING SUIT Season - that is.....

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Honestly, this was the first of many years that I didn't stress out about it TOO bad!! I didn't enjoy it - by any means (meaning it wasn't 'painless') - but, it wasn't HOURS AND HOURS in trying on suits and feeling utterly disgusted!!

I started at BRA TENDERS - this amazing bra place that my friend Cheryl (the Rockette) took me to! Funny enough, the customer before me was BETTE MIDDLER!!!! That's NYC for ya! LOL.

Anyway...I did get fitted for my new bra...and I am still a DD but now am a 34. So, after getting 2 new bras that hike these babies up....I tried on "TANK-INIS"....with bras on the inside. I Love the one I bought - b/c it's one of my favorite shades of Turquoise....

Then, I went off to Macy's to look for a bottom....thankfully these days they are selling things as separates...and it wasn't a huge deal to buy a bottom. I did figure out why they are selling suits as separates....b/c your suit is pretty much double what they used to be!!!

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ANYHOW....one of my sweet friends (Becka Marie) from my online support - Renewed Reflections - lives in Hawaii...and is gonna pick me up a gorgeous Hawaiian Sarong to go with the whole ensemble!!!

Pièce de Résistance: "The Inner Work"

If I could say anything to you about losing weight - I'd say, concentrate on the "inner work" that needs to be done. Asking yourself..."why do I struggle with ____________?" (fill in the blank with motivation...food....self-control) And start there.

If you don't do the INNER WORK first or at least - during...you will constantly be revisiting your 'diet'....or always trying to lose the "same 20#'s"...or MORE.

Honestly, for me, there are soooo many days when I don't feel 'motivated'....or I'm have a 'carb attack'...'sweet attack'....or think I feel constantly hungry. (none of which is healthy for me...emotionally or physically)

That is when I have to get 'REAL' with myself....and put some tools into action-

• What's my consistent complaint? (like my eating or my weight)
• What's my assessment?? (what's going on??)
• What choices am I making? (acknowledging that I am in control - it is my choice or decision -good or bad- I'm not in a trance being 'pulled in' - it's not something that is just mysteriously 'happening TO ME')
• What am I "getting out of it?" (It's easy to believe that the problem is my eating or my weight - but it's not....it's all about what I 'get out of it'....my pay off!)~ TO CONTROL...OR AVOID BEING CONTROLED
  ~ BEING RIGHT...
  ~ JUSTIFY MYSELF OR MY FEELINGS
  ~ AVOID LOOKING AT A DEEPER HURT OR PAIN
• What is the cost? (When I am consciously or subconsciously getting something out of my complaint there is a cost....often several....here are some I experience.)~ LOSS OF SELF or SELF-EXPRESION
  ~ LOSS OF HEALTH or VITALITY
  ~ LOSS OF LOVE or CONNECTEDNESS
  ~ LOSS OF FULLFILMENT or SATISFACTION

Once I have been authentic with myself and can see the choice I'm making what I'm getting out of it...and then to determine what it's costing me...then an only then am I able to take it to God - otherwise - all I do is complain to Him...and feel sorry for myself...and like a victim! Using this process has been the main thing that has gotten me thru this journey. I often have to do these steps DAILY!

• pièce de ré·sis·tance (pyĕs də rā-zē-stäNs') n., pl. -a French term, translated into English literally as "piece of resistance", referring to the best part or feature of something , a showpiece, or highlight. Literal translation of the phrase, however, fails to define it. The phrase gives the sense that the referred-to element is the defining essence of the whole, that part that makes it memorable or gives it its unique character. An outstanding accomplishment or the principal dish of a meal.

This process is imparative...You must walk this road - "Rue Pièce de Résistance"

Doing the INNER WORK is "the defining essence of the whole journey." Doing the INNER WORK is the "part that makes it memorable & gives your journey it's Unique Character!"

13 Month PostOp...

So...it's been 13 months...I'm at 186.4#'s.

A total lost of 147.4...

I'm amazed...and actually feel wonderful!

I'm less than what I weighed at graduation....

Still about 3.5#'s from what I weighed 10 yrs ago at my 10yr. class reunion. It was my goal to be at least the SAME weight as that reunion at my 20yr. reunion.

I'm still thinking I'm gonna wear the same dress...WHY NOT??

I spent a fortune on that "little black dress" back then....and it is, afterall, a little black dress.....so....

ANY WAY...my reunion is in a MONTH...& I'm excited!!

MYTH: Carbonation stretches out your pouch

"It doesn't stretch your pouch as is. But, the temporary expanding feeling can interfere with the eating and drinking you must do for your pouch. The true trouble with carbonated drinks is, many of you were *addicted* to it, and it often triggers cravings. Some surgeon says it stretches your pouch because that is easier to understand for you, and easier to relate. I say, stay off the stuff, but, keep just one can in the fridge for an "emergency". Often, just knowing that it's there when you can't resist your craving any more, will actually help you resist the temptation." This quote was Originally Posted by DocSanae on RENEWED REFLECTIONS BOARD

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OK...here is my 2 cents! I'm sooo glad that this "myth" is dispelled....I've heard the rumor too - but it sounds ridiculous. Although, I completely agree...and can testify to the "imprinting" of sodas in my early life!

IMPRINTING: noun - a learning process in early life whereby species specific patterns of behavior are established

Before WLS I drank 1 to 1.5 "route 44" sodas - (all kinds- sometimes a Cherry Limeade Soda...sometimes a Vanilla Diet Coke) I noticed that these were addictive in themselves....44oz. of this type of drink can really mess with your mind...and it was just an great example of my "over indulgence." We'd always swing thru the drive-thru of Sonic...and then get food at other drive-thru's....The other thing that triggered me to have a "Route 44" drink was just driving by a Sonic....I'd immediately feel the craving...even if I hadn't thought of it...or was thirsty.

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ANYHOW- After WLS...actually, several months back...I think it was last fall - so it was around 6-7mos PostOp - I had my first small drink of diet coke...I remember feeling extremely GUILTY. I even posted my 'confession.' I think I felt like I broke some "cardinal rule of WLS" - and it just emphasized that I was failing at my postop rules...and I was terrified of "stretching my pouch" - and failing at this surgery...and eventually would GAIN BACK all my weight and be OBESE again! ugh!!

So...in the last 6 mos. I've done some VERY deep soul searching & internal emotional healing. - I've become VERY aware of what is going on for me when I "crave" a soda. There is so much around the imprinting... and just like an

• AIR SUPPLY song can muster up a feelings for me of new love from Jr. High....
• SODA musters feelings of me wanting to have pizza, chips, burger, fries & Taco Bell!!

Funny enough...I think these are all things I'd eat with soda when I was in my adolescent years...and incidentally when I began my bad behaviors of my eating disorder. I continued these behaviors thru the years...

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MY EXPERIENCE:

I still have a drink of soda 'now and then'....but I do as Doc suggested. There is ONE diet (caffeine-free) coke in my fridge. There is something about it being in there - "IN CASE OF EMERGENCY" - and if I drink it...I get a small tea cup put some ice cubes in it...and try to get as much fizz out as possible. I also am constantly 'thinking', -"what's going on for me? Am I bummed or blue? why do I want this soda?" usually it's just the fizzy taste...and then I stop there. I don't like the feeling of too much in my pouch...or the 'gassy' feeling it creates if I drink more. What I think....If you can cut it out completely...do it, good for you! But if you are worried - don't beat yourself up!!! DO THE WORK...check out what might go on for you emotionally!

In my opinion....I think the WHOLE ISSUE is lack of communication....I know that it definitely 'takes two' even though that sounds cliche'....but it's true - It takes two to get together...and two to split.If BOTH are not completely committed thru thick and thin it's difficult - b/c one side can only hold up 'your one side of the bargain'.... - it's just a recipe for disaster.
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I have heard of many couples splitting after WLS....but I wonder if that is b/c of the insecurity in the mate - OR our "new found confidence"??? I'd be likely to believe that it is a combination of the two....
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I just wonder if as we are loosing weight...if WE feel disappointed that we are not given the accolades we need for our accomplishments...for our self-esteem...and our journey. And when we don't get that from our mate/partner...we contribute to their insecurities if we don't tell them...or talk to them about it.On the other side....this is a blow to the gut to our mate too. I think it's necessary that THEY go thru some sort of counseling for themselves....OUR LIFE CHANGE effects them too...and I believe if they do not go thru the 'emotional & mental' changes of life deals them with our weight-loss and new found self-esteem and confidence that may be difficult for them.One thing I have to CONSTANTLY remember is...as I gained weight - my husband dealt with my obesity in a 'certain way'...and now that I'm thin...he has to deal with that AS WELL.... This is NOT ONLY my journey....but the journey of my entire family! Just as my weight affected my life...it affected my husbands and daughters life. The same is true of my weight - loss.....
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I'm still processing thru all of this....PLEASE KNOW, this is not directed to ANYONE in particular...just my ramblings of fluid thought & how I am processing my own journey with my issues with my Spouse.

A Word to the NEWBIE of WLS...

If there was ANYTHING I could say to you "Newbies" is DO THE HEALING WITHIN - the outside success will come....

It's sooo important to get to the 'heart of the matter' of "WHY AM I OBESE??"

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I am 13mos PostOp...I'm still working on this question....

it is an ON GOING process....don't be afraid of that part of your journey.

I tend to think it's the MOST IMPORTANT part....the inner work you do in the 'early months' could make the whole difference in your food struggle for the rest of your life!!!

I'd even go as far to say....this step is THE MOST important step in ANY weight loss program.

One Year SURGIVERSARY Pictures...

WOW....

It's been ONE year since my Lap RNY....

Amazing.....time flies....

This picture is from our celebratory Surgiversary Dinner....we went to the 2nd Street Cafe - in Park Slope!!

It was soooo chilly when we left the park tonight...so we were bundled up for our long walk home....burr! (17blks home.... we WANT SPRING!)

(CLICK on the photos for larger view...)

JOURNAL: One Year Surgiversary!

What JOY I feel to be right on target with the Average WLS patient....I was reading the early pages of my blog to find all that my Doctors told me about LapRNY...My doctor said that the average patient loses 77% of the excess weight in the first year. My excess weight was 184#'s - and 77% of that is 143#'s!! Not only am I just "over weight"....I'm "average" to boot - AND I FEEL FABULOUS!!I've had my weight loss come full circle in a weird sort of way...This was an excert from my blog on one of the first days I knew my life & weight HAD to change!___________________________________________
Saturday, August 13, 2005

Wake-Up..."Wake-Up Call...."
I’m ready to go and get the information to get started with weight loss surgery. Today was my daughters 2nd birthday…there are SO many things I currently hold back, or miss out on. Her god-mother was sooo fun with her today at Chuck E. Cheese’s….
In the play arena at Chuck E. Cheese’s they have a huge crawl tube attached to the ceiling….the kiddos climb up these obstacle ladders…and then crawl thru these tubes that maze thru on the ceiling. I would NEVER be able to let her enjoy that…thankfully her godmother is soooo fun and adventurous! It rang home in a pain to my heart how my weight can subtly affect my two-year-old RIGHT NOW!! I don’t like to take her to the park – for fear if she runs too far from me I won’t be able to run after her. No more – I’m calling MONDAY!!!
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I remembered this blog when I was looking thru the pictures we took today on my Surgiversary. My sweet Husband came home from school in the afternoon today....and we first took Isabella to the park together...and then all went out to dinner!When we got home...I saw russ had taken a BUNCH of pictures of Isabella and I playing 'tag/chase' on the jungle gym playground....These pictures are soooo precious to me....they are not very good quality....but I love them!

Another reason that drove me to WLS was I never wanted to take 'Bella to the park when she was little b/c I was afraid if she ran faster than me - that I wouldn't be able to RUN after her - to keep her safe and from danger! Now...I not only could do that - but, I can Run and PLAY!! Praise GOD....my daughter is going to have a Mommy that can play....I love that for her! I love this picture of us playing tag....and then there is more where SHE is chasing ME!! Today was such a wonderful day....and evening with

my family.... PRAISE GOD for this surgery...and all the will power he's given me this year...and the success!

I've lost 143.6#'s in 12 months....

AMAZING..... :::sigh:::

JOURNAL: March 19th - 11 mos. PostOp

(Click on Photo for a closer look)

I actually like my photos from February better than these! I guess I was holding in my tummy....but this is a good view of my 'tummy nemesis'....I have this annoying pooch! I've only lost 1.2 lbs. - :::sigh::: - although, I do like that you can REALLY see my BONES around my neck! WOW....

Even though this month has been hard... I think I can see a bit of difference in the way my jeans are fitting. I'm wearing a size 14 jean....and many size 14's in other clothes as well. I'm in a XL and some Large Tee's.

The best part of this is buying new clothes for spring...I'm actually having a little bit of trouble trying to decide "WHAT?!" I want my wardrobe to look like?! Hmph!!

I really am reinventing my wardrobe....and what I want to look like from season to season....it's kinda fun - and funny - all in one! Another fun thing - is b/c I've moved from Dallas, Texas (mid-south suburbia) to NYC (north east urban) - it's not only different from the climate standpoint...but also "Mommy Wear" looks different up here!

(Click on Photo for a larger view)

Thanks to Mel for sending me 30 pounds of new clothes....and thanks for taking 20 pounds back! Thanks too to Beka for taking a 21 pound box of Deb's closet!! I hope you two enjoy them....Love you girls...& MISS YOU TONS!!

The EYE BALL: Spring Semi-Formal

(CLICK on photos for a larger view)

My Hubby is in his first year of Optometry school...one of the perks of being back in school are "School Functions!" I think it's hilarious that a school that studies the eye....has a spring dinner/dance called the EYE BALL!

We had a wonderful evening....I especially loved that I got to dress up and go out on a REAL DATE with my sweet hubby!

We went to a little place in NYC's Little Italy called Sal Anthony's S.P.Q.R. - it was a beautiful place...the appitizers were amazing. But the entree was not the best - but I think that was because they were preparing for a HUGE group of people! I loved it...we had such a nice evening....we DANCED! How fun was that....

This is nearly my 11mos. post op anniversary...this month has been a little hard because I am "officially" on a Stall....I've only lost 1.2#'s this month...I would be lieing if I said I wasn't a little disappointed. I'm trying to keep my spirit up....and still hoping that I will plug thru losing the last 50 or so pounds. But for now...I'm enjoying life...and celebrating feeling beautiful and energetic!

Weight loss surgery and brain decline

Weight loss surgery, such as gastric bypass surgery, can lead to a vitamin deficiency that can cause memory loss and confusion, inability to coordinate movement, and other problems, according to a study published in the March 13, 2007, issue of Neurology, the scientific journal of the American Academy of Neurology.The syndrome, called Wernicke encephalopathy, affects the brain and nervous system when the body doesn’t get enough vitamin B-1, or thiamine. It can also cause vision problems, such as rapid eye movements.
Weight loss surgery and brain decline
Bariatric and lap band surgeries are getting rather popular.Post surgery, folks consume a very limited amount of calories. Essentially, you’re shrinking your stomach size to that of a two year old. Of course you haven’t shrunk your nutritional needs to that of a two year old.
A study published this week in the Journal of the American Academy of Neurology points out numerous folks are experiencing memory loss and confusion as well as muscle coordination problems and vision problems.
They are tying the symptoms to lack of nutrition for the brain and nervous system – mostly B vitamins.
There have been other reports as well regarding brain functionality after weight loss surgery.
It’s basically mal-nourishment, whether you’re talking about a skin draped over bones person in a third world country, or a post-surgery “fluffy” person. The body still requires nourishment to function and rebuild itself.
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This entry was posted on Fri, 16.Mar.2007 at 9:15 am and is filed under Nutrition, Obesity, Health. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

CARBOHYDRATES: Nutrition Notes

By Theresa Stahl, RD, LDN

You may not really think of carbohydrates as brain food, but glucose, a simple form of carbohydrates, provides nearly all the energy your brain uses everyday.

Let's take a look at some carbohydrate basics:

• Carbohydrates are composed of carbon, hydrogen and oxygen - carbo meaning "carbon" and hydrate meaning "with water."
• Dietary carbohydrates include simple carbohydrates (the sugars) and complex carbohydrates (the starches and fibers).

Simple sugars include:

• Monosaccharides - glucose, fructose (fruit sugar) and galactose.
• Disaccharides - sucrose (table sugar), lactose (milk sugar), and maltose.

Complex carbohydrates include:

• Polysaccharides -which are starches (grains, legumes, tubers such as potatoes)
• Fibers -(cellulose, hemicellulose, pectins, gums, lignan, and mucilages such as guar and carageenan). Fibers are not digested by human digestive enzymes and don't provide calories.The main role of carbohydrates in the diet is to supply energy. Carbohydrates are the best source to fuel muscles and promote healthy hearts. Fiber helps lower blood cholesterol, prevents constipation, maintains a healthy digestive tract and provides a feeling of fullness, which is the most immediate benefit that helps prevent overeating.

Tips for choosing carbohydrates:

• Choose whole-grains, including whole grain breads, cereals, rice and pasta.
• Include five to nine servings of fruits and vegetables daily.
• Choose 1% or skim milk and low-fat milk products, such as yogurt, cottage cheese and cheeses.
• Eat more legumes, such as beans, peas and lentils.
• Limit sugars, such as table sugar, corn syrup and honey, which promote cavities and may displace needed nutrients and fiber and contribute to obesity.

JOURNAL: February 19th - 10 mos. PostOp

This is my 10 month LINE UP....I think I look more like myself in the "center picture"...but since that picture I've dropped 44#'s...and wow...feel a world of difference. I was size 22 there...and now am a 14.

You Can click on the picture for a Larger look....to read the labels.

I still have 47#'s until I am at goal...but now that I'm under 200#'s and in a 'normal size' (14)...I feel very proud of myself...and all my hard work.

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To all those who read my blog...thanks for your emails and encouragement thru this journey...I can't imagine my life without WLS.

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ONDERLAND!!!

HERE we are....finally in Onederland! (For those of you who are not familiar with the weight loss victory - it means I'm in the 100's!)

My journey started in THREEDOM...and with in a month after surgery crossed over into TWOTERVILLE....now, the journey had been a bit longer...but ONDERLAND is finally here!

I'm only 49#'s from my goal weight...and just about 19#'s from a weight I feel GREAT at. One of my best friends Jill came to NYC this last weekend...and persuaded me to try on her size 14 jeans...(I resisted at first - KNOWING - that they wouldn't fit...) - well....THEY FIT! I am amazed to annouce that I've gone from a size 32 pant to a 14! I feel sooo great!

Here is my weight loss ticker. (it may change as my weight goes down...the code has changed a bit with ticker factory - just so you know - TODAY it says 199.0#'s! HORAAY!)

My New Hair....

Well....over the last 3 months my hair has been falling out - LIKE CRAZY! WOW...my hair has gotten so thin, that it's become very noticable. I don't think everyone can tell...but Russ has said it's obvious to him. Finally, My friend Hanadi found a great hair picture - and that's why I went for it!

I really love it...it's short...but still 'sassy!'

JOURNAL: January 19th - 9 months PostOp

It's hard to believe this is me....

LOVE the new UGLY BETTY song... "The Beauty in Ugly"

lyrics - the beauty in ugly ...

To Diet or Not To Diet....

Happy New Year....why do we say, "Happy New Year"....there are soooo many things that are about to happen - such as the Resolutions that all include -"giving up something!?"

What's sooo HAPPY about that??

So.....here I am faced with the same ol' question..."Am I gonna go on a diet?" "Am I going to start a new exercise regime??"

I thought once I had my Weight-loss surgery...that I'd never have to go thru this yearly ritual...but I find myself back again.

Even though I lost 4#'s over Christmas (which is unheard of!)....I still know what "REALLY HAPPENED!" I know WHAT I ate...WHEN I ate...and HOW I ate! I loved those Lindors Truffles....and, "OH! how I loved them!!"~

So....even though, my body surrendered to my TOOL - my new small stomach pouch - I know that I treated my body badly...and now am retaining massive amounts of water. SO...back to the Question at hand....

"To Diet....or Not To Diet....?????"

ahhhh.....I'm even considering joining CURVES again....

BASICALLY...if I want to get the weight off now...I'm going to have to "crack down"...and work for it...if not...there could be a StandOff!

How Many Calories Do I Need?

By Sanae Tanaka, M.D.

Many people who have had weight loss surgery wonder how many calories (kcal) they need each day to reach and maintain a healthy weight. If you are not far out post-WLS, your calorie intake will be minimal, and will be below your intake for weight maintenance. In those first few months after surgery, it is critical that you stick to the recommendations from your doctor and dietitian.

However, for reference, the basic recommendation for calories when trying to lose weight (without WLS) is that you take in 500-1000 calories less than your daily caloric requirement, as calculated from your present weight and activity level. The minimum recommended calories while on a diet are 1,000-1,200 kcal/day for women, and 1,200-1,600 kcal/day for men. Most of the popular diets aim for 1,500 kcal/day.

General Physical Requirements

Your basic caloric needs are determined by your weight and how active you are. Your ideal weight range depends on your height, and equates to a Body Mass Index (BMI) of 18.5-24.9 (median 22). But, in addition to your weight, you also have to consider how many calories you burn doing daily activities to determine how many calories you need to take in. Unless you are math savvy, you will need a calculator to figure it out. However, here’s a simple equation that will give you the general range by showing you how many calories you burn daily for each pound you weigh and your level of activity.

• Sedentary, seated during most of the day: 11-13.6 kcal/lb/day
• Moderate labor, on your feet most of the time: 13.6-16 kcal/lb/day
• Heavy labor, competitive or professional athlete: 16+ kcal/lb/day

The upper limit for heavy labor is not set because it is is variable, depending on the amount of activity. For example, an average heavy laborer uses anywhere from 3000 to 4500 kcal/day, depending on stature, while for very competitive professional athletes, it may go up to over 6000 kcal/day.

Another important note: Although they are on their feet much of the day, homemakers generally fall into the “sedentary” category. This is because the muscular distribution of women differs from men, so the expenditure level is lower for women. An inactive homemaker should use the lower end of the scale, and a very active housewife, the higher end. So, unless you are doing some pretty heavy housework daily for hours, go by the sedentary and not the moderate labor figures to calculate your daily caloric needs.

Example Calculation

The examples below are for someone who works at a desk job and is mostly inactive. For each scenario, the total represents the daily caloric requirement to maintain the individual’s current body weight. (Note: This does not mean that you should maintain this body weight, only the amount of calories it takes to stay at that level.)

• 5′5”, 300lb (BMI 49.9): 300 x 11-13.6 = 3300-4080 kcal.
• 5′5”, 150lb (BMI 24.96): 150 x 11-13.6 = 1650-2040 kcal.
• 5′5”, 130lb (BMI 21.5): 130 x 11-13.6 = 1430-1770 kcal.

Distributing the Calories

Of the foods that you eat, carbohydrates, proteins and fat are the major nutrients, called macronutrients, and the source of the calories you burn. The recommended dietary calorie distribution is:

• Carbohydrates: 45-60% (No less than 130g because of the brain/central nervous system requirements)
• Protein: 10-35% (At least 0.36g/lb/day)
• Fat: 20-30%

Calculating the Actual Amount of Each Macronutrient

To calculate how much you can eat in terms of volume of food, you have to convert the calories into grams. (After all, you can’t “weigh” the calories, they are a unit of energy.)

• Carbohydrates: 1g = 4 kcal
• Protein: 1g = 4 kcal
• Fat: 1g = 9 kcal

So, as an example, let’s look at a 1600 calorie diet, with the following distribution:

• Carbohydrates 50% = 800 kcal = 200g
• Protein 30% = 480 kcal = 120g
• Fat 20% = 320 kcal = 35.5g

An important point to note when going food shopping or planning your meal is that there are no “pure” foods that contain nothing but a single nutrient, unless it has been processed and refined, as in refined sugar. Just about every natural food contains multiple nutrients, so you have to choose the food by its major content. For example, rice—which is a major carbohydrate food—contains 77% carbohydrates, but also 6% protein, and 1% fat. With beef, depending on which portion, the counts are around 20% protein, anywhere from 5%-30% fat, and negligible carbohydrates.

Maintenance Mode

First things first, you need to ask your doctor/dietitian what your maintenance intake should be, and what the macronutrient balance should be. If you need to figure out by yourself how many calories you need, the most important point is that daily intake must equal your daily expenditure. If you eat more than you need, your body will stock up the extra. If you eat less than you need, you will keep on losing. Keeping that in mind, you will have a general idea of how much you can eat, and how to balance your food intake when you reach goal. If you make the right choices with your food, you may find that you can eat a fair amount (though not as much as when your weight was at its maximum) while keeping the calories low.

Calculating your daily caloric intake immediately after gastric bypass surgery and for long-term maintenance can seem confusing. But with practice, running the numbers will become second nature, and you will also be more familiar with the calorie count and nutritional values of your favorite foods. Remember to take one day at a time as you learn healthy eating habits post-WLS. May your journey be full of rewards for all your hard work.